(Insert word here) - A culture of fear and worry surrounding the middle class based on semi-fictional tales, events and social phenomenon which can lead individuals to become detached from real world issues
Today I forgot to put sunscreen on my 3 ½ year old before Princess Camp (again) and didn’t come to this realization until I was pulling out of the parking lot and could see her spinning around in her Snow White dress laughing with her friends. I can count the number of times I wore sunscreen as a kid, so I let that worry go and sped off in my minivan rushing to cram all my errands into the next 2 ½ hours before pickup time.
I had traveled roughly two blocks before my To-Do list headed off course to the Kum-n-Go for cheapass cappuccino. Before turning in I paused thinking the chances that I actually had some cash were slim and didn’t want to be THAT girl who charges $1.27 on her Debit card. As I couldn’t think of any overpriced grocery items that could remedy my dilemma I almost turned around until I remembered I had a ton of change in my wallet and could commit to my 500 calorie breakfast choice. After getting back into my minivan I turned on the radio and tried not to think too much about how a bottle of water would have been the better choice. Afterall, I weakly justified to myself, the plastic bottle couldn’t be drank out of after it was left in my hot car or it could lead to cancer. Yes, the coffee was the better choice. Feeling better, I headed towards the first destination on my list, wondering if Kum-n-Go uses Free Trade coffee. I suppose if they did, there would probably be a sign somewhere, but I only splurge once a week on the damn things so my $1.27 can’t possibly be contributing too much to the Cocoa Bean Wars.
Heading back home with a bounce in my sugar/caffeinated step, I went about completing the first item on my To Do list: put the second coat of paint on my Target bathroom spacesaver. I turned the cheap garage radio dial, hoping it could pick up NPR and tuned into a segment about a new Food Documentary about how horrible the entire food industry is ranging from the Iowa soybean and corn farmers who concoct high fructose corn syrup to the technology geeks who advocate pumping ammonia into our cows instead of allowing them to fed off grass. Basically, the whole system is whack and the only way to go is to buy organic. The last time I stopped in the Health Food Section of Hy-Vee was to find the rice cakes with caramel and chocolate made by Quaker Oats, and I’m pretty sure they weren’t organic. Trying now to block the mental picture in my head of the girls developing a third boob or growing another toe I finished painting. I contemplated the best way to clean my brush. Rinse it in the sink and try not to think about what chemicals I was pouring into our drinking supply or rinse it in the yard with the hose and potentially kill the grass. I remember hearing gasoline can clean paint brushes, but wasn’t sure if I made that up and then what would I do with the leftover gas? The kitchen sink won as I was short on time and jumped back into the minivan to finish errands before pickup time.
Running into JC Penny’s to pick up Father’s Day slippers for my Father-in-Law I tried to stay focused on getting the slippers and getting out. Somehow ended up wandering into the children’s section and found myself distracted by tons of clearance signs for half an hour. Eventually, I made my way out of the store with just 5 items for the girls and a birthday gift for a friends little girl and the slippers. The prices were all right, but I stressed about adding the extra as I’m on a spending freeze as “requested” by the husband.
Make my way to Kohl’s to complete the Father’s Day gift and I am re-routed to another Kohl’s when they don’t have the exact pocket watch I need. I then realize I need to haul ass to princess camp to pick up Oldest child. I convince her to go to Kohl’s with me by promising her lunch at McDonalds. Get to Kohl’s only to find they don’t have the damn watch either and then wonder why the hell I didn’t just order it online since I’m going to have to mail it anyway. I leave irritated with myself and not looking forward to rushing my toddler through lunch at her favorite “restaurant” in the world in order to get her little sister picked up from the babysitters on time. After arguing with Oldest child about apples instead of fries, we sit down to inhale our lunches. Dipping my fry into ketchup I think about the documentary Supersize Me and remember he ate there three times a day, so surely indulging in fast food once a week can’t be THAT bad. Three minutes later I’m done and trying to coax Oldest into eating her apples in the car. I refill my fountain drink and my mind warns me about the story I heard involving Coke replacing people’s water intake around the world where it is not readily available. I promise myself I’ll drink a glass of water later and wipe the glob of ketchup off Oldest face. On the way to pick up Littlest, I catch a glimpse of Oldest reaching for her PLASTIC water bottle that has been warming in the sun. Nooooooooo! I scream as I slam on the brakes to avoid rear-ending the car in front of me.
